I'm thinking of getting my feet wet and dipping my toes into the dating game again. My biggest fear is not being able to avoid another "Player". My experience with the last player lasted 9 years, and that is so Not what I need right now. Remember that I mentioned in a previous blog entry how I felt that I was someone who needed a sweetheart in their life to feel complete. Though I admire my women friends who are happy being unattached, I don't think I can function like that.
It is possible that I may not be given a choice on whether I am alone or part of a pair. Fate has been rather heavy handed in her whimsical warped way, My love life of more recent times being Not very kind at all. It certainly seems to me that it is about time for a change on that front. I've done more than my fair share of crying , and I am ready for smiles, giggles and belly laughs, and yes, some mighty fine purring would be fantastic. I'm looking forward to meeting someone and taking my time getting to know them before I give my heart away again. Or....even just a great friendship with bedroom benefits, LMAO!
It has been far too long since someone romped around the sheets with me, likely close to 6 1/2 months. (that is if you can count someone who arrogantly granted me sex while he was sleeping, unbeknownst to me, with another woman- and I still say a giant EWWW!!! how gross, to that.)
Otherwise it was a longer time than that, when he was a real lover to me.)
Anyway, I will begin a dip or two into dating soon. I am very leery, almost to the point of paralysis, of chat rooms. Weirdly, I used to be comfortable there. Maybe living with someone who used them as a hunting ground for his next toy has influenced this feeling of shyness. Can you be finger-tied as well as tongue-tied? Not the adrenalin rush I had in mind. It's really too bad the days of the village wise woman have passed.
---Knock Knock---
"yes? May I help you?"
"Excuse me Mam, could you please help me?"
"Of course my dear, what do you need?"
" a wonderful man who would love me and make me very happy, please. "
"Just a second dear, I think I have one stashed back here..."
*rattle, clink, thunk*
"Ah, there he is. Is there anything else you might need dear?"
"Yes mam. Two curses, one for an asshole, and one for his bimbo."
"OH!"
Lol..sorry, I just could not help myself, it slipped out.
Well wish me luck, I am going to need it. I am reminded of a board game I played as a preteen called "The Dating Game." The object was NOT to get Mr Dud. ( that is dud, not dude) If I close my eyes and spin, I hope I do not end up with him..again.
Good night,
K
tonight's song dedication:
Led Zepplin " Been a long time since I rock and rolled."
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