I think it's sort of gross..or at the very least silly, that an adult can act like a 10 year boy.
New toys to play with, and show off. Pouting because he can not get what he wants when he wants. Sighing and playing sappy songs over and over. Love notes and constant contact.
Funny, I remember falling in love, and it did not look like that, nor did we act like that.
Regression, seriously. I think he has adapted to the age he is dating. That first rush of love when we are essentially children. Love notes passed in school. Angst because we cannot see them all the time. It is weird how people adapt to the person they are attracted to and lose themselves. I can so say after 9 years that this is so not him. It's not jealousy, it's an observation from a detached person who knows him.
I know I lost myself as well. I believed that our love had grown. How little did I know , until it was too late. Men I think, are more inclined to adopt the mannerisms and quirks of their partners. What they like, what they listen to, the favorite things and causes of the new woman in their life. It's their way of insuring that they fit into her groove. If that person happens to be younger, then I guess they will try very hard to fit into that younger image. Especially a 43 year old man. The mid life crisis moments of truth. Sadly, life will catch up to them.
Time marches on. The distance in years will show. This is something I also know personally, since it was the marching of my years that signaled the demise of our relationship. I was aging. He could not deal with that. He was not ready to be part of an old married couple. He fears getting older in a very big way. Probably due to the passing of his Dad. Mortality has a way of touching all of us. With my ex, he was in mortal fear of having something wrong medically after his mother passed. With R, it is the passing of time and not having made his niche. So he remedied that with finding someone younger to make him feel young. Do I think he was right to do this? No, and still no..I think he is only fooling himself.
I would be very interested to see who he is at 51. If he is again looking for something to make him feel young. What a shame that age and maturity cannot be appreciated and revered in this country. We celebrate and glorify the young, and totally ignore the beauty of those who have lived. We are so afraid of being old that there is a whole industry designed around making us look like we still are. It's in total contrast to the Old World European ways of family. There the elderly are revered and appreciated for what they have done in life, and who they are. In this country we bury our elders in a retirement home and rarely go to see them. We buy as much crap as we can to stop wrinkles and products promised to make us look younger. It's a billion dollar industry, at the very least. Some of these Hollywood celebs look like stretched cartoon caricatures of their younger selves. It's damn scary how far we will go to look like we are still young.
Personally, I am 51. I don't look like it because I was never blessed with children. Women age after giving birth, it marks them. To me it makes them more beautiful. To society, they are now old., and no longer of interest to men looking for a perpetual 21 year old girl. It's a very strange notion that men who are older are still sexy, and women who are older are on the shelf. Just another lopsided part of our world. Why should men have it better? They certainly, without viagra, are not performing like they did at 18. Medically speaking, women hit their peak sexually later in life, and men..have petered out after their 20's. But..they don't want to accept that part of their aging, hence the industry that has grown out of mens need to perform with a woody like they were still 18. If we paid half as much attention to saving lives as we do to male sexual performance, then cancer would be cured.
To end this entry, I would just like to say that women of later years have everything that a 21 year old has, only they have known life, grown, and have an inner beauty that a child cannot have. A girl has No life experience to fall back on, only the "now" to live in. I have serious doubts that he and she will actually make it, he is simply trying too hard to be in love. It does not seem real, it seemed forced and unnatural, and not lasting. It is an infatuation and one he will soon grow out of once life cannot be as perfect as he planned after I am finally gone. It will be perfect..for me.
New toys to play with, and show off. Pouting because he can not get what he wants when he wants. Sighing and playing sappy songs over and over. Love notes and constant contact.
Funny, I remember falling in love, and it did not look like that, nor did we act like that.
Regression, seriously. I think he has adapted to the age he is dating. That first rush of love when we are essentially children. Love notes passed in school. Angst because we cannot see them all the time. It is weird how people adapt to the person they are attracted to and lose themselves. I can so say after 9 years that this is so not him. It's not jealousy, it's an observation from a detached person who knows him.
I know I lost myself as well. I believed that our love had grown. How little did I know , until it was too late. Men I think, are more inclined to adopt the mannerisms and quirks of their partners. What they like, what they listen to, the favorite things and causes of the new woman in their life. It's their way of insuring that they fit into her groove. If that person happens to be younger, then I guess they will try very hard to fit into that younger image. Especially a 43 year old man. The mid life crisis moments of truth. Sadly, life will catch up to them.
Time marches on. The distance in years will show. This is something I also know personally, since it was the marching of my years that signaled the demise of our relationship. I was aging. He could not deal with that. He was not ready to be part of an old married couple. He fears getting older in a very big way. Probably due to the passing of his Dad. Mortality has a way of touching all of us. With my ex, he was in mortal fear of having something wrong medically after his mother passed. With R, it is the passing of time and not having made his niche. So he remedied that with finding someone younger to make him feel young. Do I think he was right to do this? No, and still no..I think he is only fooling himself.
I would be very interested to see who he is at 51. If he is again looking for something to make him feel young. What a shame that age and maturity cannot be appreciated and revered in this country. We celebrate and glorify the young, and totally ignore the beauty of those who have lived. We are so afraid of being old that there is a whole industry designed around making us look like we still are. It's in total contrast to the Old World European ways of family. There the elderly are revered and appreciated for what they have done in life, and who they are. In this country we bury our elders in a retirement home and rarely go to see them. We buy as much crap as we can to stop wrinkles and products promised to make us look younger. It's a billion dollar industry, at the very least. Some of these Hollywood celebs look like stretched cartoon caricatures of their younger selves. It's damn scary how far we will go to look like we are still young.
Personally, I am 51. I don't look like it because I was never blessed with children. Women age after giving birth, it marks them. To me it makes them more beautiful. To society, they are now old., and no longer of interest to men looking for a perpetual 21 year old girl. It's a very strange notion that men who are older are still sexy, and women who are older are on the shelf. Just another lopsided part of our world. Why should men have it better? They certainly, without viagra, are not performing like they did at 18. Medically speaking, women hit their peak sexually later in life, and men..have petered out after their 20's. But..they don't want to accept that part of their aging, hence the industry that has grown out of mens need to perform with a woody like they were still 18. If we paid half as much attention to saving lives as we do to male sexual performance, then cancer would be cured.
To end this entry, I would just like to say that women of later years have everything that a 21 year old has, only they have known life, grown, and have an inner beauty that a child cannot have. A girl has No life experience to fall back on, only the "now" to live in. I have serious doubts that he and she will actually make it, he is simply trying too hard to be in love. It does not seem real, it seemed forced and unnatural, and not lasting. It is an infatuation and one he will soon grow out of once life cannot be as perfect as he planned after I am finally gone. It will be perfect..for me.
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