tonight

Tonight
in a bad place.
Have no idea why
or what I ever did
to be put here
by someone I love.
I was supposed to be dreaming 
about weddings
and honeymoons and sunshine.
Now I have no vision
of tomorrow.
No dreams
for a future.
No love in my life.
He just wants me gone.
To easily forget.
To never be a reminder.
Out with the old.
Trying to move in the new.
Replaced...so quickly.
Heart tired.
Weary and feeling very empty.
Sometime I feel my only option 
is no where.
Each way I turn..an obstacle.
Each way I turn there is a catch.
And sadly..I would have been happy 
to do these things
with his support.
Now no arms are there.
And the net is missing.
A quick fall.
A silent passing.
And never remembered for
what I gave and shared.
Laughter..hugs..long involved debates
drives to new places, finding things together.
All gone..stolen by a heart that wandered 
so quickly, and easily away.
No resistance..searching..and replacing.
A new pair of shoes.
what a waste...those dreams were 
beautiful to me.
Each one spent together.
Be it a quiet night, or a sun lit horizon.
Never routine, if you are with someone you love.
Now the quiet..the silence of 'pushed away'.
The sound of a trash lid bouncing.
Echos and tears.
No music.
No me.