So, time has obviously gone by since that horrible ending in 2011. I live alone and I have found peace within myself at 66. For those folks who wonder, no, I never dated or searched for another partner. During early days I thought about it a few times but ultimately talked myself out of dating again.
I realized that the damage was too great. I just knew that I'd be unable to trust another man, and couldn't bear the thought of trying and failing, which would be unfair to both of us even if he was not like my past partner.
So I'm alone but not unhappy. I never have to feel betrayal like that again. Never have to live with someone who gaslighted me and blamed me for his actions. I've actually learned a lot about people who do that. I deserve better than a morally broken man .
As I've stated in other posts, I'm partially to blame for not wanting love to die. I could have left and should have. Now a days this is all a very bad memory that I wish I could erase from my mind. Kind of hard to erase 9 years. I danced in limbo until a bad fall messed up my back and then after Covid I retired young.
So yeah, I'm on my own and have peace of mind. If by some warped reality we had stayed together I never would have obtained it. There was always some crisis always of his making happening all the time, and it usually took my finances to fix it. I can't believe how much I spent on speeding tickets, past child support, his back taxes, his vehicle always needing tires, brakes, etc. If left to his own devices he would have done something stupid like a robbery.
Guess his new partner must keep him straight, good for her it's a full time job, and expensive. But his life of main character energy is likely over, hopefully he got over his Don Juan life style and settled down. But this woman wouldn't bet on that.
Cheers! To all visitors passing through. I wish you happy lives without drama. Believe me peaceful is 100 % better.
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