Last night in slumber my brain told me a tale..a very strange one. In it my ex had moved Jacqueline Bissett into our home. He and she both had dyed brown hair, and he had grown Justin Bieber bangs..lmao! They were both doing drugs. On a drive to a store (echoing the Walmart drive) I tried to berate him for seeing someone 20 years older...lol! He was the chameleon, changing for his latest partner. An " I don't care " look on his face.
I guess..the old brain was sending me a message. If it had not been the baby, it would have been someone else. It would not matter if who he found was younger or older, he would adapt to whomever they were, and I needed to realize that and get over it, and stop blaming myself for any of the choices he made. Yup...ok..got it...strange messages..got to love 'em.
My biggest regret is losing a friend and he was.
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